What Is a Core Wound? Plus, 6 Misconceptions!

A core wound is a negative belief we acquire, usually in childhood, that is deep-rooted. We then go on living life with this as the lens that we see the world through. For instance, if a child gets bullied on the playground, they may come away with the deep-rooted belief (core wound) about themselves of 'I Am Disliked'. Many years later, as an adult, they avoid that social gathering because they believe that people will not like them. Core wounds are just automatically projected onto things we come across in life. One of the key things to remember about core wounds is that they will be there until they are reprogrammed. Bringing awareness to our belief system is only the first step. We then have to actively do something about it. So we can see how this happens in situations in childhood. Let's talk real quick about what is going on at the brain level when these situations occur. Understanding the science behind this will help you to understand how to heal this later on. The first thing you need to know is that core wounds take root in the subconscious mind and the language of the subconscious mind is not words - it is EMOTION. It is not enough to understand that these beliefs are false. We then have to explain that to the subconscious by speaking its language and reprogramming. Emotion is what reprograms. For instance, knock on wood, someone gets into a car accident. That single, very intense feeling of unsafety can form the core wound 'I Am Unsafe' because of the strong emotional imprint that happens. That being said, when we are actively knocking out a core wound, we are up against a deep-rooted program and we also must use REPETITION. Repetition plus emotion is what reprograms. A good reprogramming process would be a daily routine for 15 minutes for a few months. Okay, moving on to the second example. Someone grows up in a household where a lot of fighting and chaos took place with many instances of feeling uncomfortable or unsafe either emotionally, or physically, on an ongoing basis. This can also hardwire the core wound 'I Am Unsafe'. It is common to have a few to several core wounds.

Another important thing to know about core wounds is that every time we think thoughts and feel feelings associated with a core wound, we are firing and wiring that neural pathway deeper. That is why stopping those thoughts in their tracks and not going far down that pathway is crucial. 'Being for a solution instead of against a problem' which basically means emoting to the solution (the OPPOSITE of the core wound) instead of emoting to the problem (the core wound) which then reprograms that in instead! One vital way of doing this key first step is disidentification. We must bring to the forefront of our minds that the core wound is a program running in our subconscious mind. It's kind of like a track running in the background on repeat that life has programmed in and we can change it!

Okay, so what are some common misconceptions about core wounds?

1. Misconception number one: "Core wounds cannot be healed." I really just wish that knowing that it's possible was common knowledge, but it's not. Let's start this one off by talking about what is actually PHYSICALLY happening to our brain when a belief is formed. What is happening at a NEUROPLASTIC LEVEL when beliefs are formed? The brain is quite literally changing. The brain has neuroplasticity which is the brain's ability to grow new connections within itself. Neurogenesis is the birth of new neuron cells. If these neurons survive and are utilized, neuroplasticity (the creation of new connections between neuron cells) takes place and the connections become stronger and stronger. This is the scientific explanation behind what is going on when a core wound is formed and then reinforced through getting activated in different experiences in life. Now, all of that being said, if these neural pathways are not utilized, they will wither away. This is an illustration of how disidentification and stopping unhealthy thought patterns in their tracks helps us in the reprogramming process. This is also why repetition is so vital to the reprogramming process. People used to believe that the brain does not grow or change in our adult lives, but science has proven this to be completely untrue. You can reprogram and change your life at ANY age. The concept of healing core wounds applies to anyone who wants to put in the work and create change. You did not come into the world with core wounds and you can reprogram them the same way they were programmed to begin with. In my healing journey, I’ve had core wounds that are kind of surreal to think about at this point because I remember feeling them strongly and I just don’t anymore. They’re no longer a part of my experiences in life.

2. Misconception number two: “We can just ‘let core wounds go when they are no longer serving us’”. It’s very problematic to tell a person in suffering to ‘just let it go’. The reason that this is not possible is because core wounds are not conscious decisions so they cannot be solved at the conscious level that way. They are rooted in our subconscious mind and the conscious mind cannot overrule the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is much more powerful. That is why, for example, you don’t see people stick to New Year’s resolutions. If they were just about a conscious decision, it wouldn’t be that hard. But people have subconscious drivers holding them back in this situation. You can liken the mind to an iceberg. The small part above the surface is the conscious mind and underneath there is that much larger chunk that represents the subconscious mind and also the unconscious mind at the bottom. The subconscious mind is filled with programs that we are not actively choosing. You didn’t go through, for example, a traumatic time with a parent and say “I’ll go ahead and take that core wound with me please. That should serve me later.” We have to address the root cause and heal at the level of the wound which involves actively putting in work to reprogram the subconscious.

3. Misconception number three: “My core wounds are ‘just who I am’”. Since core wounds are programmed at such a deep root level in the subconscious, our entire experience of life and existence as we know it kind of forms around them. That is reality to us and we don’t know any other reality is even possible a large part of the time until we learn about these things. Much of our belief system has formed in childhood. Our self-identity kind of forms around all of this. The truth is core wounds hold us back from who we are. They stop us from reaching our full potential with limiting beliefs. It’s easy for core wounds to make us conclude things like “Oh, I could never do x, y, z because I’m not good enough” if you have an “I am not good enough” core wound, for example. Then you don’t see yourself in your dream job, etc. and it is very much a part of your self-identity. When we learn about core wounds and how to heal them, we are no longer held back and are ABLE to form our self-identity and choose in life.

4. Misconception number four: “I am too deeply damaged to heal”. The truth is that this is just simply not true. The physiologic changes that are going on whether you are going through the process of healing a couple core wounds or 15 deep-rooted, severe core wounds are the same. Yes, the blatant truth is that it can take longer and require more, but the process doesn’t change. It takes consistent work, but it works. When I first started reprogramming, I had at least 15 core wounds so I can speak from first-hand experience that your effort really will eventually completely pay off.

5. Misconception number five: “This core wound keeps me safe.” This one might actually be hard to spot because it often shows up subconsciously.The thing to look out for with this one is RESISTANCE when you’re doing your reprogramming. This one shows up quite often and is paired with our biggest core wounds. This basically happens because the subconscious mind is concerned with two things: 1.) Maintaining your subconscious comfort zone - which is basically just maintaining what we’re used to whether it is good or bad. And 2.) Surviving. If we had x-belief this long and survived, the subconscious mind just believes we will keep on surviving with it. One way to combat this subconscious misconception is to use the cost-benefit analysis in your reprogramming routine. It’s good to start off with this and then move on to reprogramming the wound itself. This will rewire this misconception and program in positive associations with getting rid of whatever core wound you’re working on and programming negative associations to keeping this core wound alive. For example, if you’re working on the core wound ‘I am Unsafe’, you can ask yourself what having this core wound has cost you in life. Maybe it’s robbed you of life experiences. You would then ask yourself ‘How would my life be better without this core wound plaguing me?’

6. Misconception number six: “You will grow out of your core wounds.” I want to close with this one because it cannot be stressed enough how untrue this is and for more than one reason. The subconscious mind will not change until it is reprogrammed. You can be 80 years old and still have the same childhood wounds that were never healed. Why is this? All day long we are viewing life through the perception of our beliefs and the mind makes the assumptions about things that don’t go our way based on our beliefs. For example, if you have the core wound ‘I am Rejected’, you might be quicker to think you’re rejected if someone doesn’t call you back rather than maybe they just got busy with life. Core wounds actually just grow stronger and more deeply embedded with time if we are firing and wiring these beliefs without equilibrating them.